I Never Thought I'd...

There are so many things I never thought I'd do in my life. In fact, they were so far removed from me, I never even thought of them to think I'd never do them.  Some of you may relate.

10. I never thought I'd say "can you hear me?" I say it probably dozens of times a day.

9.  I never thought I'd clean smeared human feces off a stroller. That was a bad day.

8.  I never thought I'd be a stay at home mom. From my childhood, through my relationships, through my pregnancy, through the babies' first 18 months, I was sure I was a committed career woman. This one still throws me for a loop quite often.

7.  I never thought I'd have to explain that going to the bathroom was not a competitve sport. Who ever heard of tantruming because you don't have to poop and your sister does?

6.  I never thought I'd beam with pride when my kids decided that playing imaginary games is better than TV.

5.  I never thought I'd be singing the theme to "Elmo's World" at the top of my lungs in a public restroom to distract my daughter enough so that she could actually do her business, while annoyed women slowly formed a line outside the john.  She went, by the way.

4.  I never thought I'd live in north central Florida. I never thought that if I ever ended up here, I'd be worried about school systems.

3.  I never thought I'd think of a warm cup of coffee and a bowl of cereal eaten while actually sitting down as a luxury.

2.  I never thought I'd go running when I heard a suspicious "shhhh" with my heart in my mouth. Usually it's to the kitchen. They'll either have salt or milk, or sugar, or flour. Something messy. "Shhh" is always bad.

1.  I never thought I'd have twins. Never. Twins? I mean, I know many people have triplets, or a toddler and then twins, but for me, twins is basically the ultimate crash course in parenting. Twins.


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