Delving into the World of Twin Toddlers

This, I'm sure, is mainly a twin phenomenon but parents with singletons born close together probably go through it as well. It takes up so much of my time that I honestly wonder what toddlers that aren't twins even have to talk about, ask about or whine about. My kids having an identical counterpoint certainly defines our entire lives, day by day. Here are a few examples of problems I have dealt with, just this morning:

"Bon dia, mama, hug?" Dulce crawls onto me in the bed.
"Nooooo. It's my turn! My hug!" Natalina starts screaming by the bedside.
"You're next Lilly. Give Dulce her turn."
"No!" Lilly scrambles up trying to push Dulce out of the way.
After a few moments...
"Okay, it's Lilly's turn now."
Dulce scurries down to my knees, Natalina on my chest, where she proceeds to kick Dulce in the head.
"No! Stop kicking me Lilly! WAAAAAH."
"Lilly, stop kicking Dulce." She stops.
"No, her feet still there. Noooooo!"
"Dulce she's not touching you, it's okay."
"WAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH!"


"Dulce has flower shorts. Where MY flower shorts?"
"Well, you have the flower shirt, is that okay?"
"No, I need flower shorts. I NEED FLOWER SHORTS." Proceeds to try to yank Dulce's shorts off of her.
"No! Mama! HELP! No, Lilly, I HAVE THE FLOWER SHORTS HAHAHA."
"No, mama, my flower shorts. Give me flower shorts." I go to the closet to get another pair of flower shorts.
"NO! Dulce's flower shorts. I don't want those. Give me Dulce's. They are mine!"
"You can have these flower shorts or none at all."
"WAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!"

"I'm stuck. I need to move the couch!"
"No, you're not stuck. Leave the couch alone. Dulce is sitting on it." Lilly moves the couch.
"NOOOOO, LILLY. STOP!"
"Lilly, stop moving the couch."
"Cu mes (Excuse me) Dulce. Cu mes."
"Dulce, please move over to your side of the line so Natalina can sit, too."
"NO! I won't. I'm sick. I'm lying back."
"Dulce..." She moves. To Lilly's side of the couch.
"Mama! MAMA! Noooooo, Dulce! That's my side, move, move, that's mine!"
"Dulce, move over to your side. Lilly, stop moving that couch."
"WAAAAAAAAH!"

"I want to pick a video. Down basket." I move the basket down so they can look.
"I want frogs one."
"No. I want princess one."
"Okay, we'll watch the frogs one, then later we'll watch the princess one."
(This next part they speak together.)
"NO! No frogs one. Princess one now!"
"NO! No princess one later. No princess one."
"Right, but we're watching the frogs now which is what you want, so why are you worried about later?"
"NO princess one!"
"Yes princess one!"
"Princess one later."
"WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!"

"Tada! Poo poos!"
"Good job! Let's wipe up and flush the toilet!"
"NOOOOO! Wait for me! Wait for me go poo poos!"
"Dulce, we have to flush this right away. We can't wait for you."
"NOOOOOOOO!"
Lilly flushes. "Hahaha. My fast one!"
"WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!"

"I want lollipop."
"Okay, here you go."
"No. Lilly's is bigger."
"They're the exact same size."
"No, I need a big one."
"It's the same size as Lilly's, look." I take the pops to compare them."
"No! My lollipop. Don't give it Dulce. It's mine." I hand Lilly's pop back to her.
"No! This is Dulce's. I want mine!"
"That is yours."
"NOOOOOO!"
"Okay, well, let's switch then."
"No, I don't want Lilly's. I want mine now."
"Okay, no lollipops."
"WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!"

"Put your hair up."
"Okay, I'll put it up in a minute."
"No, don't put it up. Down hair."
"Well, it's down right now."
"Put it up!"
"In a minute I said."
"NO UP. DOWN."
"But...it's already down."
"WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!"


What do kids do all day if they don't have someone to CONSTANTLY FIGHT WITH OVER NOTHING? I feel like my days would be so boring without the constant barrage of pushes and pulls. Ugh, twins. The darker side.

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