Road Trip!

Why would a person take two four-year-old girls on a two-hour car trip to go to dinner, then drive them two hours back? Exercise in torture, most likely. Still, yesterday at 3 p.m., I packed up my half-sick girls and off we went. Back by 10:30 p.m.

A huge reason, of course, is that a good friend of mine is visiting the state all the way from Canada. We went to see her.

But, why not leave at 10 in the morning? Why not spend the day, instead of just a few hours?

Good questions.

Answer 1) I had some stuff to do. Figured I could pound that out, then we'd go. It's like I don't even know me. When I finally get that stuff done, there's still enough time to go for a day trip. Which leads us to Answer 2.

Answer 2) Have you ever tried to go anywhere with twin four year olds? It's like gambling. Could take five minutes, could take two hours. Yesterday, it took the latter. First, they were hungry. Then they had to argue with me about exactly what kind of lunch they were hungry for. (They got PB&J, much to one's delight and the other's dismay. You can never win with twins.) Then it was time for socks and shoes. And I can't do that for them anymore because they're big girls and can do it by themselves. Very s l o w l y. After forgetting about what they're doing midway about 50 times.

Then potty. But one has to go poop, so then the other one won't use that same bathroom, oh no. It's too stinky in there! (It didn't stink at all.) She had to use the upstairs bathroom. Well, then, why did the second one get to use the upstairs bathroom when the first one had to use the downstairs bathroom? That's it! The first twin is taking off her shoes in anger and despair. The world will never be the same. Meanwhile, I've got the other one calling down to me, asking if she wet her hands enough. Then if she put enough soap on. Then if she rubbed them enough. Then if she...just wash your damn hands, girl, jeez!

So, now I've got the upstairs bathroom twin crying at me because I won't tell her if her hands are dry enough, and the downstairs bathroom twin going nuts because I obviously hate her forever because she chose to use the downstairs bathroom (they can always use whichever one they want. So long as they use a bathroom at all, I'm happy.)

And we haven't even gotten started yet.

Then I check the directions on my smart phone, which tries to take me to an entirely different place. Thankfully I realize this, and work hard to straighten it out and get the phone to find the right place. Now the twins need a snack. And one for the road, they decide. Then they fight about what to bring for the car ride and I want to give up on life.

By now, of course, I know we're not going to make it back for dinner, so I email my husband (who is not feeling well) to let him know I'm thinking about driving two hours down to Orlando for dinner with the girls.

His response was: "It's fine on my end, but I worry for you." No kidding.

Okay, we're ready! Snacks in hand, let's get in the car!

Oh, wait, someone has to use the potty again.

So, we left at around 3:30 p.m.

They didn't sleep on the car ride down, but we only had a few minor breakdowns (one over the fact that I cannot physically put grapes back on their stems. I'm such a jerk, seriously.)

Anyway, there are many more stories from when we were there and from when we went back, but I'm all tired out. For now, suffice to say that it was hard, but worth it.

Oh, and the answer to the original question is this: I eventually want real people in my life. If the girls are to become those people, they are going to have to start doing things, and lots of them. Expanding their horizons and such. Coming along with me. I cannot remain holed up in my Gville apartment because the thought of taking them anywhere further than the grocery store alone scares me.

So, points for us all, just for doing it.